When did I lose my need for speed?

My boys want me to take them snowboarding.  You know:   the mountain, the adrenaline... the velocity.

For some reason, I find myself wishing I would spend the day on the lake instead, paddling my twelve-foot kayak... never surpassing the pace of a brisk walk.  When did I lose my need for speed?

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Every year on my birthday, my wife has me draw a single word from a purple velvet bag.  The bag is full of terra cotta hearts... one word having been pressed into the surface of each stone back when the clay was still tender and malleable.

The year my word was "shift."

I wasn't sure what do with my word.  Now if my word had been "courage" or "wisdom" or "joy", I might have felt more sure, but "shift."

Shift conjures up a litany of images.  Speeding up.  Slowing down.  New direction.  New journey.  Shifting priorities.  Shifty personality?  That can't be it.

I spent much of my life with a bicycle as my primary transportation.  Most my years overseas that was the case, as well as any time before the age of eighteen.  When you ride, it is counterproductive to shift five gears at once.  Shifting is a progression.  Small changes to adjust your pace to the immediate needs at hand.  Shifting up or down is determined by the urgency of the moment, the grade of the terrain and, more often than not, how much you desire to take in the view all around.  It can be a choice to be more present to the moment.

Taking in the view... that seems like a meaningful theme for the year.

Many years ago I was introduced to a meditation called a breath prayer.  It is a simple practice and a staple of many spiritual communities throughout history.

You chose one phrase for the inhale and one for the exhale and speak the phrases silently to yourself while taking long intentional breaths.  To complete the metaphor, you begin on the exhale and the phrase is something that you want to expel from your life, then the inhale is a truth or hope that you want to manifest.

Perhaps this year my mediation will be something like:

"Leaving behind my regrets...
Taking in the view."

It's a work in process.

Happy New Year.